on the way to the car.

walking around, perfect day, i told my mom about how i maybe have a crush on michael chabon and how exciting it still is, that he went to school here, that the nice guy who owns the book shop two blocks from where i live has fond memories of him working there. and how he writes his reviews of other writers' work. and senior seminars. rob always teases me when i get starstruck; when we went to the low show i was all "there's mimi!!" :b

there were wedding photos on my friends page (and you are all so prolific--it took forever to finish reading, and i was only gone a day and a half). it reminded me of how none of my friends currently think they'll ever get married. so whose weddings will i attend? i like them, when they are simple and quiet gestures.

this evening i'll try the red curry sauce my mom picked up for me. and...let's see...

/

my family still kicks ass, and they're alright; apparently a mini icestorm occurred and they'd been without power for quite some time. they sent justin a care package. :) ...they have good taste in who they care about. something we agree on. ;)

dad thinks maybe i should think about chicago. just thinking about it, myself, twists my nerves. (aside from his gross overestimation of my abilities--) i don't know, i don't know yet. i wish i knew for certain what i want to do. i never feel certain.

there was something else...oh yes. i have this letter, or post, i want to send, but i'm hedging. don't think i will, just yet.

many things, trotting calmly through my brain. a pleasant enough sensation, for now. and letting all the parched girlghosts sit down and watch is fine by me, for today. at least for today. i don't know why; i'm fickle, inconsistent. sometimes remembering bothers me, knifes me, even. but. mm...not today. "the reason why? man, i don't know." things about loneliness and resentment, but it went away. swirling off.

(laundry politics. brzmm...)

i guess for today i'm just not hung up on hurting. i plan to roll with it.