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  • It’s Not You, It’s the Dating Apps

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Jerry Banfield
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It’s Not You, It’s the Dating Apps Kindle Edition

by Jerry Banfield (Author) Format: Kindle Edition
It’s Not You, It’s the Dating Apps is the book I wish someone had handed me years ago, back when I was wasting thousands of hours swiping on Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, Match, OkCupid, Plenty of Fish, and even Facebook Dating, wondering why online dating felt so hopeless. After getting divorced, becoming a sober single dad, and listening to countless men and women in real life talk about their dating struggles, I finally saw the truth: nothing is wrong with me, and nothing is wrong with you—the problem is the dating apps themselves. In this brutally honest book, I share why these platforms feed us bots, contractors, catfish, scammers, marketing funnels, and fake “likes,” how they weaponize rejection, how they destroy confidence, and how they keep us swiping instead of actually meeting anyone. Modern dating has become algorithm dating, and the more time and money you give the apps, the worse your results get. I explain why good women and good men rarely connect online, why dating after divorce is even harder on apps, and why real-world connection always beats digital matching. Most importantly, I share the twenty-five real-life ways I’m now meeting women without apps—fitness classes, yoga, run clubs, museums, co-working spaces, volunteering, spiritual communities, dinner parties, dog parks, travel, and even just saying hi at Whole Foods. This book isn’t from a dating coach; it’s my raw, sober, first-person account of walking away from online dating and rebuilding my love life through actual human connection. If you’re tired of swiping, tired of feeling invisible, tired of dating burnout, and ready to meet people in person again, this book will show you exactly how I’m doing it—and why deleting the apps might be the best thing that ever happens to you.
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  1. Print length
    37 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Accessibility
    Learn more
  4. Publication date
    November 18, 2025
  5. File size
    1.1 MB
  6. Page Flip
    Enabled
  7. Word Wise
    Enabled
  8. Enhanced typesetting
    Enabled
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Product details

About the author

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Jerry Banfield

Jerry Banfield

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I write books that tell the story of my life as it happens. My series, Daily Autobiography, is my unfiltered record of living honestly — documenting each season of change, healing, and discovery through daily reflections written or dictated in real time.

Before I began writing full-time, I spent over a decade as an online creator with millions of followers across YouTube, Facebook, Udemy, and other platforms. I experienced the highs of internet fame and the emptiness that came with it, eventually deleting everything to start over and reconnect with real life.

I live in St. Petersburg, Florida, where I focus on being a father, writer, and coach. My work explores what it means to live truthfully — from marriage and sobriety to divorce, spirituality, and rebuilding from the ground up.

I write to share what I’m learning, to make peace with my past, and to remind anyone reading that they’re not alone. The book I recommend reading first is I Was Famous on the Internet to get to know me.

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