Ding a ding dang

Goodbye, puppy.

3weasel — Fri, 22 Jan 2010 06:21:50 GMT

My dog died. Heart failure. Mom took him for a walk, he came back breathing hard and heart racing. She called me, in tears, as soon as she got home from the vet's. At least he didn't snap in half, as dachshunds are wont to do.

He was more my brother's dog -- he was only 10 or 11 years old, I never had nor wanted a childhood pet -- but he was a good dog, and could count to three; Dad always gave him three treats, and if anybody gave him less than that he'd look up at them and do the sad-puppy face until he got the third.

I'm a godless heathen, so I won't ask you to pray for my dog, but I am married to an Irish baroness, so my humble request is that you pour a double of your favorite drink and toast to Bandit.

Why I'm an atheist, but still respect some preachers

3weasel — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 05:13:16 GMT

Or: On being a journalist on the weekend of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day in a town that's only surpassed in racism by certain parts of Georgia and Alabama

Prelude: The church the MLK day Sunday service was held at this year (it rotates between mostly-black and mostly-white churches every year, for the "togetherness" theme) was Mobberly Baptist, named after the street the original church building was on. It's now a "white" church on the extreme north side of town; that area is the new business district, but when the church moved there in the mid-'70s it was the only non-residential building past the mall, a couple miles south. Mobberly Ave., the original location, is on the south side of town -- I go down that road today, I'm the only white boy south of the newspaper office (located in the middle of the old downtown, a block south of the Highway where all the north/south streets hit zero). In other words, white flight like a motherfucker, and yet they still take their turn hosting the MLK service, presumably hoping to atone for the move.

So the service had the pastor of the hosting church (Guido McCracker, looks like a guy who would borrow your car in New Joisey, and shoot somebody in it) saying something that boiled down to "Hey, you ~~niggers~~ wonderful people from all over town, we all love each other here because we're Christians."

Then the high-school MLK essay contest winners; the third- and second-place contestants were black kids who made good points. First place was a white boy who referenced 9/11, at which point I stopped listening -- I know, NEVAR FORGET and all, but it's been eight years, get over it. Next up: the school art contest was dreadful, one of the trifecta being built around a terrible pun (Shoes on a globe, "Soles" as a pun on "souls").

Then the head of the city's race relations committee, talking about how all the young black men are in jail and implying that it's the fault of the White Man, otherwise they'd be productive members of society instead of felons. (Reporter to me, on smoke break: "Has she ever talked to those guys in jail? I'll admit that it's partially society to blame, but jeez, those guys are fucked up.")

After that, a white protestant preacher (I forget his exact denomination) and a Southern Baptist preacher (who appears to have some non-European blood, but he's from Baton Rouge, and that alone makes it a miracle he got to be in charge of an SBC church in this town) read from the New and Old Testaments. I forget the exact chapter and verse, but neither were all that related to the topic at hand.

Then there was some more singing (which I've not been mentioning, but there was music between each paragraph above, the only decent one being a woman with an awesome voice masterfully singing Dr. King's favorite hymn), and then a black Baptist preacher gave the sermon, which, again, was at best tangentially related to the occasion. At this point, two and a half hours in, I (and my reporter, who got nothing from anybody earlier -- usually he can write this event in the first ten minutes with quotes from the intro and go home early -- and really needed ten inches of copy) would've been satisfied with a speech about how Whitey's still keepin' the black man down, but it was standard modern-Christian bullshit about how "if you have problems, JAYSUS will help ya!"

At this point, the reporter an I were worrying that we wouldn't have anything to say about the service. But we'd sat through three hours, and it was still a good 20 minutes to deadline, so we stopped on the way to the door to hear the closing prayer.

The Reverend Lamar F. Jones, pastor of Galilee Baptist in Hallsville (not technically in the city this was being held in and nominally unifying, but close enough to be in listed in the Greater Longview phone book), stepped up to the pulpit for the benediction. That's what it said in the program, anyway.

Brother Lamar's speech, however, damn near made me find religion. First he did the standard "if you're not a Christian, but have found God, come to the altar and accept Jesus into your heart now" bit. No theatrics, no shouting, no singing (I suppose the budget for all that was used up in the sermon). Just speaking in a conversational tone into the mic. Nobody moved. "Well," he said, and chuckled. "I guess we're all saved, then."

(I'll just copy-paste from the news story for the big ending, copyrights be damned, because Glenn Evans is a far better writer than I -- for all the shit I give him about a picture being worth a thousand words, Glenn is a Journalist, with the capital J, in the mold of Hunter S.:)
______________
Then he issued his secondary plea, first describing the ministers' earlier discussions about race relations in Longview.

"As a matter of fact, we're sick and tired of coming each year and saying, 'We're going to do better,' and never doing better," he said. "We come across to various churches (each MLK Day) and we worship together, and sometimes we don't see each other for another year. But, this year, we're going to do better. We're going to make a change. We're going to do what's right, and part of doing what's right is we're going to make a commitment."

He then invited the remaining 300-plus congregants to gather before the pulpit where he stood. All but a scattered few answered the invitation.

"Tonight, if you're ready to make a commitment, we'll do better this year," he said. " 'I'm willing to get to know somebody that I normally don't take the time to get to know.' It's not about black, it's not about white. It's about us as a community coming together, willing to make a difference."

Members of the congregation before the pulpit joined hands, some hugging while others lifted palms skyward in the cavernous sanctuary.

"Say, 'Tonight I'm going to tear down my prejudice,'" Jones said. "It's our home. We live here, work here, worship here. What matters tonight is, we are Christians, and by the love we have for one another, the world will know when we walk out these doors that we're going to make a difference. Dr. King had a dream. You need to have a dream. I dream of Longview being a better place. I dream of Longview not having north side, south side — just Longview."
______________

In conclusion, I raise my glass to Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., who helped to end segregation if not racism; to the Reverend Lamar Jones, whom I respect for his sincerity of belief even though I am not a believer; and to Glenn Evans, who is a Journalist like Lamar is a Baptist, and takes notes in his own personal form of shorthand far faster than I can even listen (and then asks me for help deciphering his own handwriting).

3weasel — Sun, 27 Sep 2009 07:35:58 GMT

No matter what your opinion of country music, you have to admit Neal McCoy is one hell of a showman.

Statistics

3weasel — Sun, 26 Jul 2009 05:39:04 GMT

Going through my userpics, I have:
Nine booze-related (most have liquor in the picture, the bonus point is the Derrick sunset -- it's a liquor-store sign)
Seventeen cigarettes/cigars/pipes
Seven top hats
Three cameras
Seven with at least one firearm/cannon in the picture
Four typewriters

New userpic

3weasel — Sun, 26 Jul 2009 05:10:12 GMT

I want this sign for my own kitchen.

3weasel — Tue, 21 Jul 2009 06:21:32 GMT

THE FUCKING MOON

We've wasted 40 years. Damn you, Nixon!

40 years

3weasel — Tue, 21 Jul 2009 06:20:48 GMT

I've been too busy watching it live to post about it.

The Kevin Bacon game, with ballplayers' butts

3weasel — Sun, 21 Jun 2009 08:39:53 GMT

I just realized I am well within six degrees of ass-touching to Nolan Ryan, God of Baseball (see previous entry):

I, being a big brother, have disciplined my little brother with spankings.

My lil' bro played high school baseball with Chris Davis, currently first baseman of the Texas Rangers. As you all know, ballplayers pat each other on the ass regularly.

Chris is on a team with Hank Blalock, who worked with Pudge Rodriguez, who was the other half of Nolan Ryan's badassery.

On a semi-related note, Ryan threw a 100mph fastball to Pudge, and Pudge threw a 100mph fastball to second base to pick off the stealer. Why did anybody bother trying to steal a base against them? It just wasn't physically possible. I'm considering working out the math, but no. I mustn't.

Pudge actually started out as a pitcher, but was too good -- the other little league coaches petitioned to have him moved because he was pitching too fast and scaring the batters. It is the opinion of commentators and teammates alike that Pudge could play any position on the diamond (except maybe 1B, he's too short).

I hope when he retires (if he ever does -- looks like he's going to challenge Ryan for longevity) that he follows in the footsteps of the original Pudge and throws a ceremonial first pitch to his favorite pitcher.

In other newsy news, Ivan-Pudge recently surpassed Carlton-Pudge for the record for most games caught. So now the two longest-lived catchers in the history of the game have the same nickname. And to make it even more awesome, Rodriguez beat Fisk's record in a sort of subway series against the team that made him famous.

Here's Pudge kissing a dude because it's hilarious:

Baseball!

3weasel — Sun, 07 Jun 2009 10:30:15 GMT

Somehow the topic turned to baseball, and I mentioned Nolan Ryan because he was a pretty badass dude. Come on, the man pitched 27 seasons, retired at age 46 two games earlier than he'd planned because his arm blew out. And he threw one more pitch after he tore a ligament; that last pitch of his career, with floppy noodle arm, was a 98-mph fastball.

Then I GIS'd him, and I cannot stop laughing at this picture.

Probably the only instance in MLB history where a batter charged the mound and the catcher intervened to save the batter. August 4, 1993 -- Ryan beans Robin Ventura of the White Sox, Ventura charges the mound, Ryan puts Ventura -- 20 years his junior -- in a headlock and gets six punches in before Pudge rescues him. Ventura and his manager were ejected; Ryan was allowed to stay in because he didn't move from the mound, and finished the game without giving up a hit.

And this one is just fucking :metal:. Caught a line drive with his fucking teeth, and finished the game, pausing only to wipe the blood off on his shirt and glare at the next batter in a manner reminiscent of Harry Callahan's ". . . you've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?' "

June 6: 65 Years

3weasel — Sun, 07 Jun 2009 06:44:48 GMT

Company E, 16th Infantry, 1st Infantry Division, wades out of the Higgins boat and into Hell to drive the Nazi scourge out of France. Photo by Robert F. Sargent. Click for bigness.

I don't know why I make this post every year; my grandfather was in the Pacific. I guess I have a thing for D-Day like chikkiboo has for the Great War. Or maybe I just think it's awesome that everybody said "Y'know, we're tired of this Nazi bullshit. Let's invade Europe." and then went and did it. A tiny island nation got together with their colony and former colony half a world and a whole lot of U-Boats away and rescued an entire continent (with a bit of help from la résistance). Outnumbered by well over two to one, we got almost as many of them as they did of us, and began the end of the (second) war to end all wars.

Hats off to Ike, Monty, le Grand Charles, and all those who served under them, with a nod to the rank-and-file German soldier too -- piss-poor management, but the average conscript was just doing his job on pain of death, after all.

Please excuse the lateness. I've had a long day.

From chikkiboo

3weasel — Sat, 25 Apr 2009 04:05:37 GMT

Ask, and I will..

1. Tell you why I friended you.
2. Associate you with something - fandom, a song, a color, a photo, a word etc.
3. Tell you something I like about you.
4. Tell you a memory I have of you.
5. Ask something I've always wanted to know about you.
6. Tell you my favorite user pic of yours.
7. In return, you must post this in your Lj.

Tweet Street - it's neat!

3weasel — Sat, 11 Apr 2009 09:38:00 GMT

Do you like music? Do you like good writing? If so, check out chikkiboo's music blog, Tweet Street.

PHOTOMEME

3weasel — Fri, 10 Apr 2009 08:55:34 GMT

Photomeme, from hey_giffy.

Ask me to take a picture of anything, anything you'd be interested in seeing from my life. Home-related, art-related, people-related, [special I-do-this-for-a-living option: work-related], anything at all.

Must be suitable for publication in a newspaper (which is my way of saying "keep it PG").

The zombie apocalypse has begun.

3weasel — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 01:47:53 GMT

Man was attacked and bitten by a guy who chewed and swallowed the bit of skin he bit off. Attacker had been recently released from hospital for treatment of a ~~zombie bite~~finger injury.

Of course, it could just be an average Saturday in New Orleans.

Stupid things to say when giving directions

3weasel — Mon, 23 Feb 2009 06:38:11 GMT

"Yeah, you're on the right road. Hey, you'll probably see me! I'm standing on the side of the road with all the cop cars!"

(It was somebody else getting arrested, i was just taking a picture of the takedown.)

Memecat

3weasel — Sun, 01 Feb 2009 05:26:50 GMT

Open Paint, close your eyes, and draw a cat!

I fail at outlines.

If you're ever in south Fort Worth

3weasel — Thu, 22 Jan 2009 03:16:33 GMT

Go here to eat. 12-ounce ribeye for $8, and it's good (both probably more due to the fact that it's an indie joint in Cowtown than any special effort). It has an attached bar and an oil derrick for a sign/theme, both worth extra points in my book.

How to get there: Go south on 35W until you see it on the right. It's the exit before the Miller brewery -- it's on the exit you take to get to the brewery, but if you pass the Miller sign you've gone too far.

3weasel — Wed, 31 Dec 2008 23:56:50 GMT

I'm half-deaf, tired, and achy, but I got to see this in person, so it was worth it.

HOLY SHIT

3weasel — Sat, 27 Dec 2008 07:02:51 GMT

Hammer's "Can't Touch This" and Falco's "Der Komissar" have the same fucking bassline.

Too bad it's too soon for a remake.

3weasel — Fri, 26 Dec 2008 05:29:07 GMT

We were discussing the A&E show Mad Men, and how disappointing it is that it's actually a period soap opera, and thus does not live up to our expectations, having read the memoirs of one of the titular lunatics.

So, of course, we figured out how to do it right: first of all, it should be more about the job than the people; second, the plot of every episode should be put in motion with the main character in a bar in the present, telling a story about his time as an advertising executive in the good old days, when the intoxicant of choice was Martinis rather than cocaine, and you solved difficult problems by locking yourself in the conference room for the entire weekend before the Monday presentation with nothing but an art director and a case of gin. A sample episode opening:

We begin with an old guy in a New York bar talking to the camera, preferably played by the man himself. We've come in right in the middle of a conversation; he's just getting to ". . . that reminds me of the time [Soandso] was shtuppin' [coworker]'s wife."

Fade to a '60 Madison Ave. office, the wife bent over a desk getting railed, banging the desk against the wall. Dolly through the wall to the next room, where the much younger version of our host is giving a presentation to The Client, and one of his awards is inching its way toward the edge of the bookshelf. The ad exec notices this, and stands, spreads his arms and says "and THAT'S how we're going to sell your product," to cover nudging the trophy back onto the shelf with the back of his hand.

Smash cut to Saul Bass-style opening credits. The meat of the episode is a lot like The Office, but played straight; it's a drama with absurd real-life situations (the high-pressure problem-solving and plot of the sample episode are lifted straight from Jerry's book, which you should go buy RIGHT NOW) and witty banter instead of jokes, somewhat in the same style as Rescue Me.

New layout woo!

3weasel — Wed, 26 Nov 2008 00:51:02 GMT

F1-themed. Titles and header text are from "Jesus Built My Hotrod".

Fuck politics

3weasel — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 04:40:02 GMT

Today's meme

1. Stop talking about politics for a moment or two.
2. Post a reasonably-sized picture in your LJ, NOT under a cut tag, of something pleasant, such as an adorable kitten, or a fluffy white cloud, or a bottle of booze. Something that has NOTHING TO DO WITH POLITICS.
3. Include these instructions.

Click for completely unreasonable size.

Airshow, 11-1-08. Justin Baker/News-Journal Photo © 2008 Longview News-Journal.

I has a proper hardhat!

3weasel — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 05:57:24 GMT

I've had a hardhat for awhile as part of my TF2 Engineer cosplay, but it was probably compromised via the modifiations to make it sit low on my head like the in-game model. Yesterday I went to work with my dad, and noticed his awesome oil company hardhat, which he got from going to work on an oil rig's A/C and not having one of his own -- they're required pretty much everywhere outside the barracks on a rig.

I've always wanted an old-school full-brim hat, with bonus points for being from an actual oil company, so I offered to buy him a civvie model and trade. Today he called me and told me to swing by the house and pick it up -- he went to a different rig today, and stole one from them so he could give me the awesome one (the new one is pretty dirty and ugly in comparison -- it has paint and shit all over, whereas the only filth on the one he gave me is fingerprints in Texas crude oil).

My dad is awesome.

Front and back. Yes, the back view is turned backwards on my head because I was taking the pictures myself in a mirror.

Random poll is random

3weasel — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 04:10:45 GMT

Inspired by rue_deday, though mine's more of a personality test thatn a "do you get the reference" thing.

View Poll: #1242150

I'm back, baby!

3weasel — Fri, 08 Aug 2008 02:53:25 GMT

Back to LJ after not reading for a few months, back in Longview, back at the newspaper. Woo.