Somtimes I wonder what ‘enough’ feels like. To be strong enough. Smart enough. Good enough. To have enough time. Have enough money. Have enough discipline. Have enough patience. Where does the line lie where enough is enough and you’ve done your best and accept the rest?
Black Heart
I am in a fight against myself
At war with the thoughts in my head
I wonder how much longer I can last
Before I finally end up dead
When the thoughts turn depressing
And the tone becomes despair
I try to change the direction
But sometimes I just don’t care
I sometimes find myself adrift
Trying to understand it all
Day after day of struggles
There must be a pending fall
As time passes on like it always will
My heart slowly turns to gray
And with even more passing of time
My heart may turn black one day
I guard my heart with an iron fist
My soul I have buried in steel
At the right times I smile and laugh
But inside I don’t really feel
Everyone thinks they know me
I’ve tried to set them straight
They don’t hear a word I say
Which only fuels the hate
One day it will not be like this
I will eventually find my own way
Or at least that is what I hope
As I begin another day
Scared of Love
Sometimes I find myself
Feeling very scared of you
But in a way that’s new to me
And I don’t know what to do
Never have I loved anyone
The way I’ve always loved you
A love so deep, content, and set
It can only be love that’s true
It’s hard for me to imagine
How you could ever feel the same
My life has so far left me
With all these tears of shame
I am trying to let you in
But it’s very hard to do
Parts of me never before seen
And I want to share them with you
Yet when I try to open my mouth
No words come out at all
Fear strikes me into silence
Because I am so scared to fall
I am scared to feel more pain
Lucky I’ve made it this far
If I were to let you break my heart
It’d be the worst possible scar
You ignite a fire in me
Unlike any I have known
My love for you slept for years
And now it can be shown
A love not only realistic
But deep rooted to my core
A love so crazily romantic
To leave me always wanting more
So hard to give away my trust
Leaving my life in your hands
So hard to believe it’s possible
To feel like this for only one man
When fear sets in, I reach out
The last thing I want to do
And you calmly bring me back
Like it can only be done by you
Twisted Destiny 